I do not shy away from stating or exploring some of my most formative childhood experiences. Particularly abuse, bullying, addiction, and systemic disbelief. However, something that this has left me with, what other people have told me, is an overriding sense of empathy for others. Since I have suffered, I do not want others to suffer. Acknowledging this suffering requires something from us to recognise in others; *your pain is real*. Then something that naturally follows for me is a sense of duty to make this suffering in others less than it is currently. This requires some level of accountability in me. Not accountability over the causes of suffering but accountability and responsibility in reducing it. However, something that I am beginning to realise is that easily exploitable.

Going to the doctor is taught to be thought of as a helpful and universally positive experience. In the world of modern medicine, where we have machines that can read the signals inside our brains, the doctor is widely thought of as one of the few people we can be honest with. They're universally helpful, supportive, and the first step on a path to better health. This is true, to some extent, especially for physical health. However, though, doctors are also people. And people, especially those with power, require extra containment.

I have gone the full gamut of genders, woman, man, and now something else. You notice that I didn't say 'non-binary', and that's because, as I have continued to explore myself and this new gender, I have become less and less comfortable with 'non-binary'. For a time, it felt right and accurate, I had been both binaries and now am not in that binary. Ergo; non-binary. Right? Well...